I woke up this morning not quite believing that it is already the end of March 2017. It felt a bit surreal, this time last year I was getting ready to drive the 2 hours to Daylesford to get married to my best friend.
It is quite crazy how fast time has flown by and how quickly our first wedding anniversary has arrived. So I woke up today and felt the need to do a retrospection on our first year as a married couple.
It has been a crazy ride; Scott and I accomplished a lot in our first year as a married couple. We bought our first home, went on two major overseas trips, I had a major career change (going from a science job to a corporate one) and we started this blog. We have also recently re-evaluated our life trajectory and what our goals are.
It feels like a lot has happened in this year, so much so, that I feel the need to write the journey in our first life as a married couple.
Marriage is hard work.
Scott and I had known each other for six years, been in a relationship for three years and living together for two years when we got married. So we were very comfortable with each other and knew each other inside out.
Even then, we had to find new ways to compromise and communicate with each other. Marriage in many ways felt like a more serious commitment than a de facto relationship and fights and disagreements seemed to have larger ramifications.
Growing together not apart.
It has been a bit over a month since I woke up one morning and drastically changed the direction of my life. I suddenly realised that I wanted completely different things that I wanted the day before (to be fair, I had not been satisfied with the state of things, career wise for a while now). But to Scott, it must have felt like a freight train hitting him at 100 miles per hour. I started talking about travelling more, starting this travel blog and living life differently. I was no longer happy to work a 9 to 5 job, buy a house and have 2.5 kids, I was craving adventure and my 5 year plan suddenly looked different.
In retrospect, I should not have been surprised that I changed trajectory, after all, the goal toward which I had been working towards for the past ten years had been realised. I was an Australian citizen (and no I didn’t become an Australian because of my marriage to Scott. My citizenship is a result of my skills and qualifications and I am bloody proud of it).
So now that my goal had been realised, I should have known that my ambitions and drive would not let me sit on my laurels. A fire had been ignited and I woke up suddenly seeing another path, a life of adventure.
But for Scott it felt weird and sudden. We had to sit down and talk and compromise about what we were both comfortable with and find ways to grow together and not be torn apart by this change.
To be fair, we are still working on a compromise that we would both be happy with. But it is us working together.
You may not know this about me, but whenever I am truly happy I stop walking and randomly skip. I have been told by many that it is childish. For me age is just a societal construct. I am only as old as I feel (and what biology dictates).
But being married means that society views you differently. I mean, am I a different person to yesterday when I was not married? Of course not, but society suddenly has all these expectations of you and to that I say ‘Hell no’.
I live according to my rules (as long as I am not hurting anyone else), and not by anyone else’s.
Being Married is wonderful.
I won’t lie, like all couples Scott and I have the occasional argument, but we are still each other’s favorite person. We prioritise spending time with each other more than anything else. I know that he has my back and vice versa.
And even though for the majority of my years on this planet I have lived on my own and without him, I cannot fathom what life would be like without him. He completes and complements me in ways I cannot describe.
He is my best friend, my favorite person and my soulmate.
Home is where the heart is. For me home is wherever Scott and I are, together and happy.
Happy first anniversary to us, here’s to many more.